being heard

A Technique for Developing Presence

Use a timer to make this technique even more impactful ~

Use a timer to make this technique even more impactful ~

How do you clear the slates of your mind to become present to what you are encountering – right now? This is the key to being present, to living fully in the now, and to being truly available to those with whom you are spending your time.
 
Are you frustrated, like I am, with people looking at their phones instead of into your eyes?

We live in a world where many of us are distracted by social media, what’s popping up on our smart phones, and the on-going feeling of never getting enough done. Presence– or the lack of - is a real problem for relationships and for communicating effectively.
 
Say hi to “What’s On Top?”! I love this technique for purposefully making yourself available for life in the moment. We used this strategy in group process at our womens centers, and I have carried it through in the groups I lead today.
 
One of my recent program participants used it in our phone conversation today and I thought, “This is a great share for the blog!” Everyone could benefit from this simple but powerful communication and presence technique. 
 
This strategy for cultivating greater presence is called “What’s On Top?”
 
Here’s how it works. Before you actually get into the agenda of what you came together for, each person takes a turn to share what’s on their minds. Think of it as a quick mind dump. In groups, we use a timer so that it’s a structured, intentional way to release what’s occupying your mind. And then, focus on what’s in front of you. With practice, you’ll find it easy to let go of the distractions and be more focused in the moment.
 
In a world where we are being bombarded with more information and “stuff” vying for our attention, you can intentionally create ways to re-focus. Developing strategies to become present to those you love and with whom you work gives you more credibility, deepens your influence, and allows you to experience the intimacy you naturally crave and often miss out on. 

Let's give what we want to receive. Are you willing to invite others into more fulfilling commutations and connections with you, to create them together? 
 
Try this technique, share it with your peeps and enjoy the gift of really listening and truly feeling heard!
 
Feel free to forward this blog to a friend or significant other with whom you want to try out “What’s on Top”. Together you can experience deeper and more meaningful, effective and more productive, conversations and connections.