How do you hold back?

When I was a little girl I loved to live full on, no holding back.

When I was eight I broke my wrist doing gymnastics swings from an iron clothesline.

When I was nine I went head first over the handlebars of my bike as I sped down the road, requiring double layers of stitches to close the hole I created on my chin.

When I was ten I rode farther from home than I was allowed to go to play at the elementary school playground. As I biked wildly into the parking lot I slammed into and over a chain that was across the lot to keep intruders out. I scraped the whole front of my body. This time I went home and quietly cleaned myself up in the bathroom. I’m not sure my mum ever knew.

When did I stop living full on? When did I start holding back my passion and verve for living at full speed? It may have been that last tumble that stopped the trend.

Am I living full on now?

Sometimes - in some ways. I still have a tendency to behave more reservedly than I feel inside.

 At 58 years old I am remembering just how passionately I want to experience and feel life.

I do not want to bungee jump or free fall out of a helicopter. I don’t really want to scuba dive or trek the high summits.

But I do want to know the passion of love – every day. I am traveling the peaks of self-expression and self-realization. I want to share the depths of those I love and live intimately beside. I want to feel fully what I came here to feel and know.

I want to pursue my vocation with wild abandon and see what happens.

I am willing to break a bone, or my heart again. I am willing to take a few tumbles and get scraped and scarred once more.

I am ready to soar with the wind and feel the intensity of living in passion and bliss.

My sweet husband encouraged me to buy this new bike over the holiday weekend. We had so much fun riding together - I loved riding alone even more. The freedom is all encompassing then. I am hoping the bike will help me re-embody my willingness to live full speed ahead. Here’s to living full on :)

Do you have a desire to live with more passion?  Are you a courageous woman? Do you want more? If so, I’d love to support you into the space of living more fully, with more passion and zest. We are just finishing the first 9-month Live Your Inner Power program and our group is living more fully, more passionately and more authentically.  I’d love for you to join our growing community of women who want more – and are now living more. 

How are you holding back? What do you want to change? Leave a comment and let's talk about it!